blank

As I open my book, I lifted up and uncap the pen, I just go blank and don't know what to write.

I look at my lap top, scroll down the saved pages of research from the net, I thought I know what I'm gonna do, but I don't.

I just go blank, I don't know where and how to start.

As I look blankly at the blank page of my book and the words of the research pages, I just let time pass me by. Seconds, Minutes, Hours and end up a week, weeks and months. This is how I waste my time doing nothing, for weeks.

I know what is wrong but, I'm still like that, doing nothing.

I dream big, wish and hope big, but not doing anything. What is that?

I know how to advice people, but when it comes to myself, damn it, nothing.

Like what my friend said before about me. "Ask to do little things, I don't know or I don't do at all"

Since then, I really want to change,.....there's always a BUT.Feel so stupid, and lousy.

I even envied my friends who are better than me, and I told myself, I can do it, but what? NOTHING.

I've disappoint my family and friends. Even lecturers.

They looked up at me, hopes on me. They thought they see some potential in me, but I've failed them. I feel much more pressure and scared to do what is beyond.

This is how I wasted my time, on chatting, surfing, and when I feel like blogging, to let go whats inside me, I just blog, like what I'm doing right now (when I was blogging)

I have a week left. Nothing is done. I have lots to do, and I thought I can do within 2 weeks, and now a week, I got more panic, but still lazy and wants to sleep. OH MARN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't get my eyes of MSN, facebook and blog page. Its like a routine, whenever I on my lap top, all these 3 must be on and checked.

I'm scared what I'm doing for not doing anything, and for what I've done.

Just feel like blogging..and now I'm done for the moment. There're much more to say, but not for now. I must head back home and work or SLEEP.